The Lighter Side of Hell

Thank you for your support thru my latest adventure in medical trauma. Medical issues have stabilized, and I'm now at home recovering from my broken leg. After surgery, I spent 10 days in the Renown Rehabilitation Hospital to learn how to transfer in and out of my wheelchair (without the cartwheel double twist maneuver that broke my leg last month) and without putting any weight on my broken right leg. This seemed to me like asking water to to run uphill, and I was not all that optimistic. Somehow, I managed, and here I am one month out and now I'm allowed to put weight on my leg.

I did want to share with you a couple of lighter moments from the ordeal, because face it, it's only humor that sees us thru. First, transfers from the wheelchair back to bed should have been filmed for Saturday Night Live. Two women in their late twenties did a fireman style lift of my legs and arms, and it was pretty smooth until we all ended up on the bed, laughing and tangled up like a collapsed pyramid of cheerleaders. James' response, "How can I get involved in that?" Remember folks, we were not cheerleaders, but one poor person with a BROKEN LEG, and the other folks trained professionals in an ORTHOPEDIC WARD!

Then there were the taffy pulls. In the morning, an aid or a nurse would attempt to pull off the breathing mask that I wear while laying down. Many people wear these things for sleep apnea, and once awake, don't need them, so I guess it's an innocent enough mistake. For me, it's actual LIFE SUPPORT, though, so I'd appreciate at least being asked before taking it away from me. I'd get a death grip on it, and the nurse/aid pulling from the other side would stretch and stretch the elastic to the point of threatening facial injury should it snap. My face contorted in horror, she'd eventually give up.

Twice telling an RN that she had given me the wrong pain medication she responded, "Can't you take just this one anyway?"

Finally, kudos to my friend Mechele for staying overnight twice so James could get some rest. Mechele, a single mother of two who burns her candles at at four ends minimum, thought laying in the bed next to me and watching TV was fairly light duty, even when it seemed I woke her up several times an hour. She actually thanked me! I said, "Hey, glad I could help you this time, but if you think I'm breakin' my other leg so you can have time off....." Kicking back on a bed pillow, she retorted, "Enough, Lis, we all have to take one for the team!"

Mother Femur!